I know it seems so taboo, making friends is something that you have been doing since you were like 2 but some how it is something I find myself constantly mulling over. How do grown adults make friends? I mean as a culture student we learn that there is a sort of science towards making friends which can be separated into four categories: proximity, necessity, regular interaction, and shared interest/skills. However, what class doesn’t teach you is how to speak to people in a way that doesn’t look like this:
Seriously. This is a real problem, I am not the only person who looks at people and goes “Damn, I want to be friends with you” then spends the next 2 months thinking of how to make that happen. Friendships can be, if not worse, just as hard as relationships. You find someone you like, you interact with them, you make a fool of yourself and then spend the next 6 weeks waiting for them to forget that interaction before making another move.
Obviously not all friends are that hard to make, as said before there you easy friends (aka your roommates) who are forced to like you because of the proximity. I mean it doesn’t work that way for everyone but I have made some good friends that way so.
However there are also friends in the workplace or at school that are seemingly impossible to make. I mean how are you to talk to these people?
So here’s my basic layout for attempting to make friends:
1. Identify potential cool people. They will probably be wearing fedoras or taking selfies at the gym. (I like my friends down to earth and stylish)